|THISISAWAR.COM: JANUARY 2014 - MAY 2014|
This month, we're going to address loss, which is, like love, one of the great universal experiences. Have you experienced a life-changing loss, material or emotional? How did it affect you? And, most importantly, what constructive means or attitudes helped you through the night? If you write to us here, we'll publish the best experiences. In the interim, read our sections on grief and depression here and here; you'll find a lot to make you think. And if you need a break, read this and this.
The suicides of fashion designer L'Wren Scott, Mick Jagger's longtime partner, and the New-Zealand-born Australian model and television host Charlotte Dawson have caused us all to address the issues of love and loss. In 2003, The Eclipse: A Memoir of Suicide, Antonella Gambotto-Burke's account of the loss of her ex-fiance and beloved brother, was published. Her ex-fiance and her brother were popular, glamorous, professional success stories - one edited a major magazine; the other was an executive at an investment bank. On paper, the kind of men mothers want their daughters to marry. But the reality of their lives was very, very different. One was plagued by addiction - to sex, drugs, cigarettes and alcohol; the other by unrelenting darkness. Both men came from emotionally toxic families, and both had been raised to believe that public image is significantly more important than private reality. "Losing a beloved scars," Gambotto-Burke writes. Battered by grief, she took refuge in her work, shying away from the intimacy she had learned to associate with anguish.
And came to the realization that changed her life.
This year marks the tenth anniversary of The Eclipse's publication. Since its first tentative steps into global consciousness, The Eclipse has been published in four languages and loved by thousands; Gambotto-Burke is regularly told by readers that it has saved their lives. "What happens to those of us shattered by the suicide of a loved one?" writes bestselling author Anna-Leena Härkönen in the preface. "Antonella Gambotto-Burke has given us a voice." Härkönen continues: "She wants to know; she wants to understand; she wants to survive. Because first and foremost, The Eclipse is a story of survival. Gambotto-Burke drags us into the depths with her, and then she helps us re-emerge." Buy this unforgettably beautiful, life-affirming book at Amazon.
Another step you can take toward happiness is to borrow or buy this DVD. We watched it and fell in love (who can help falling in love with Louise Hay? I mean, really). It is simply impossible not to feel even marginally better after watching it.
We are also great believers in posting constructive messages up around the house - some of us use Louise Hay cards (see below) , others just scrawl messages in thick black pen on paper - so that everywhere you look, the news is good good good.
Because the first step to happiness, really, is believing in the possibility of change. Everything flows from there.
Finally, those of you who are parents will appreciate that perfection is an ever-shifting mirage. But Laura Markham can bring you close. An angel in mufti, Laura has written a book that no parent can afford to be without, Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids: How to Stop Yelling and Start Connecting. Frankly, it should be handed out with every baby. Most parenting books focus on changing your child's behaviour; Laura's focuses on regulating your responses, staying connected, and coaching instead of controlling. "We all want to raise children with whom we stay close, children who adore us, children who carry on our legacy of love when we've gone," she writes. Because who ever enjoyed being controlled? So get yourself a copy and subscribe here!
And if you haven't already, please sign on immediately for free wireless amber alerts - you may just save the life of a child. And whatever you do, don't forget to print a number of these up, fill them out to yourself or one you love to whatever sum you like, and let the universe do the rest! You don't have to worry about how, when, or why ... if your intention is loving, the money will follow. We tried it and - unbelievably enough - it works! So thank you to the lovely Rhonda Byrne for The Secret.
Marcus Aurelius, immortalized in Ridley Scott's film Gladiator, once said: "The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts; therefore guard accordingly." In The Deeper Wound, Deepak Chopra writes: "Suffering can be defined as the pain that makes life seem meaningless … Don't be afraid to ask for contact. Reach out." If you are feeling suicidal, click here.
Browse the site at your leisure. Send relevant links to those you think would benefit. Bookmark the site. And, most importantly, enjoy. (There are also Yahoo! groups relevant to just about every circumstance.) You may want to donate five dollars to Children of the Night, an organization that saves abused children from prostitution. To read more, please click here; to donate, click here. Or buy a family in need the means to support themselves from the Smiles Gift Catalogue here.
Otherwise, enjoy exploring our site (below) and have a wonderful, true, and life-affirming month!
With blessings from all of us at thisisawar.com
* We are not affiliated with any religion, nor do we seek donations. All we want is this: readers interested in intelligent writing. *
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